Each of us is the result of a mixture of influences, parental and childhood conditioning, work, relationship and social experiences, economic situation and peer group influences to name just a few. Some of these influences have pleasant memories and associations while some are less pleasant. The less pleasant ones are what these pages are about.
Many of the less pleasant experiences have a strong tendency to cause deep and lasting changes in how we see oursleves and to the way in which we relate to the world around us and to other people. These experiences can range from early childhood abuse - physical, mental and emotional - through school and adolescent problems to those we have as adults. They may involve actual physical events such as rape, molestation or assault, emotional aspects such as being constantly put down by others or told that you are 'different' in some way. They may also be medical in nature such as breast cancer, hysterectomy, prostate or testicular cancer, infertility, impotence or many other possibilities. Any of these things can leave any of us with adverse ideas of how we relate to the world around us.
Most of these changes are due to a lowering of self-esteem, a feeling that somehow we are less worthy, less lovable or less of a person as a result of these experiences. This usually causes a withdrawal, a reluctance to become involved and/or a fear of being hurt or rejected which, in turn, affects how we relate to others and can become a self-fulling prophecy, a vicious circle or both.
The most common place that these effects seem to manifest themselves is in our most intimate relationships with those closest to us or in our ability to form, particpate in and enjoy such relationships.
Each and every one of us is, first and foremost, a valueable, worthwhile and useful Spiritual Being. Also at this time, each of you who read these pages are engaged in a learning experience in a physical body. (Me too.) This learning may take many and varied forms, even for one individual spirit in any one lifetime. Some of these forms will be enjoyable, others less so, but each has its lessons for the spirit concerned.
All of these lessons involve our emotions because it is through our emotions that we learn our spiritual lessons. Our emotions are inextricably intertwined with the way in which we see ourselves and the world around us. A very large part of this has to do with our sexuality, how we view ourselves as sexual beings and how we think others view us. Some of us have very good feelings about these aspects of ourselves, some deservedly so, others perhaps less deservedly so, while others have less favourable feelings about these aspects.
Many people who have less-than-favourable feelings about themselves and the way they are seen by the rest of the world are worried or even afraid that others will find them unattractive or unworthy for whatever reason. For others, there are feelings of rage, hatred, betrayal, disappointment, distrust or insecurity among many others.
Unfortuneately, it almost never occurrs to these people that there is something that they can do about this. If they become more comfortable, confident and at ease with ALL aspects of themselves and see themselves as valueable, worthwhile and desirable people, then others are more likely to feel comfortable around them and want to be in their presence. This applies especially to those who have survived some form of experience that may have left them feeling that they are 'dirty', damaged or incomplete. (The latter usually applies to those who have undergone surgical procedures to remove some part of their anatomy.)
The Bottom Line was written to help all people have had unpleasant experiences in their lives to come to terms with those experiences and to restore their own feelings of well-being and worthiness. It has worked for me and for many others who have tried the ideas and methods given in it. It requires only that each person approach it with an open mind and a desire to improve themselves, the way they relate to others and their enjoyment of life.